Every Man has a Right to the Left (and other neo-proverbs)

megaphone_neoproverbs_250

No matter how much you cheat the government in taxes, you’ll never get close to being even. Trust me.
(Tim Geithner, Treasury Secretary’s proverb)

Good intentions make the most noise.
(Proverb of Obama’s Economic Recovery Team)

All good things are either illegal, immoral, or lead to obesity.
(Kennedy family proverb)

Surely you can fool all the people all the time.
(Proverb of the mainstream media)

To err is human, and we use this faculty frequently and with much pleasure.
(Proverb of the US Congress)

All work and no pay makes Jack an exemplary citizen.
(Proverb of Obama’s Economic Recovery Team)

If toast falling off the table always lands butter-side down, it is safe to presume that toast buttered on both sides will stop and hover in midair.
(Proverb of Obama’s Economic Recovery Team)

All that glitters must be taxed.
(Proverb of the Ways and Means Committee)

Every time the government tries to organize the economy, the only thing that stays organized is crime.
(Proverb of the Chicago Mafia)

The people are not only our most precious recourse, but also a means of enrichment.
(Proverb of the US Congress)

Too many cooks don’t pay enough taxes.
(Proverb of the Ways and Means Committee)

Every man has a right to the left.
(ACLU proverb)

Every rake deserves a chance to be stepped on repeatedly.
(Proverb of Obama’s Economic Recovery Team)

For a lie to become believable it must be published in The New York Times.
(Proverb of Democrat strategists)

Teach someone how to fish, and you lose a Democrat voter.
(Proverb of the Teachers’ Union )

You will be driving your old car for a longer period of time if you don’t buy a new one.
(Proverb of Obama’s Economic Recovery Team)

No matter how much whiskey you stock up in your desk, you always wind up sending an aide for more.
(Ted Kennedy’s proverb)

Attractive women are distractive.
(Bill Clinton’s proverb)

Man can stare infinitely and without motion at three things: burning flame, flowing water, and another man working.
(Proverb of the Department of Labor)

No matter how hard you negotiate your labor contract, there will always be an asshole who works even less and gets paid even more.
(Proverb of unionized workforce)

Child-proof electrical outlets are there to make sure that only the most gifted children get electrocuted to death.
(Proverb of Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA))

Safety violations may result not only in a person’s death, but also in a person’s birth.
(Proverb of Planned Parenthood organization)

If a man wants to have a life, medicine is powerless.
(Kennedy family proverb)

If your wife isn’t talking to you in the morning, last night’s party must have been a success!
(Clinton family proverb)

Why is it that when you converse with God, it’s called prayer, but when God converses with you, it’s called schizophrenia?
(Rev. Jeremiah Wright’s proverb)

A woman wants a lot of different things from one and the same man, while a man wants one and the same thing from a lot of different women.
(Clinton family proverb)

Having a tough day? Try changing your gender.
(Janet Reno’s proverb)

Never spend your own money when you can spend the government’s. Charity begins with a lawsuit.
(Proverb of community organizers)

Let bygones be hammered into everyone’s brain using news media, television, and Hollywood.
(Proverb of Democrat strategists)

Government helps those who refuse to help themselves.
(Proverb of community organizers)

If necessity is the mother of invention, government mandate is the fairy godmother.
(Proverb of carbon emission regulators)

A bad workman blames corporate greed and lack of government oversight.
(Proverb of the Financial Services Committee)

All that glitters must be equally redistributed to each according to his need.
(Proverb of community organizers)

Having naughty children in the back seat can result in an accident; having a naughty accident in the back seat can result in children, followed by a story in The National Enquirer.
(John Edwards’ proverb)

Never pick on a Democrat candidate’s family; attack something he cares about instead.
(Proverb of Republican strategists)

If you can’t lick them, tax them.
(Proverb of the Ways and Means Committee)

He who pays the piper must also cover his health insurance and retirement benefits.
(Proverb of Obama’s Economic Recovery Team)

The most beautiful thing about the environment is that you can turn it into an election issue.
(Proverb of Democrat strategists)

Be careful what you legislate; it may do exactly what Rush Limbaugh said it would.
(Proverb of Rush Limbaugh’s listeners)

Never argue with a loaded Kennedy.
(Proverb of Republican strategists)

If wishes were horses there’s be no need in fossil fuels
(Proverb of oil executives)

Give your opponents one hundred dollars worth of steak, and you shall receive one trillion dollars worth of pork.
(Proverb of the US Congress)

The difference between a kleptomaniac and a Congressman is mostly one of semantics.
(Proverb of the US Congress)

Don’t tax you, don’t tax me, tax that fellow who didn’t vote for you and me.
(Found buried in a federal “stimulus” bill)

All it takes to prove that I am the smartest guy in any room is for the rest of the people in that room to believe me when I say it.
(Joe Biden’s proverb)

Multiculturalism is when people of all races, colors, and creeds join hands in a common effort to blame the Jews.
(Proverb of Columbia University professors)

Advertisements
Published in: on February 5, 2009 at 12:00  Leave a Comment  
Tags: , , , ,

The URI to TrackBack this entry is: https://sniroadwarrior.wordpress.com/2009/02/05/every-man-has-a-right-to-the-left-and-other-neo-proverbs/trackback/

RSS feed for comments on this post.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: